Let's build a snowman...
Cookie exchange/chance to win work prizes Friday at work. With my rudimentary baking skills, would this be too ambitious? Also...do cake pops count as cookies?
Sometimes you need a bunny
A couple weeks ago I learned that a friend of mine passed away suddenly of an overdose. Because this has been tapping me on the shoulder since I first heard the news, because I like having a single repository where I can dig up these things when I want to, because I'm lazy, but mostly because I couldn't write anything better if I tried...for Jeffy. I wish I could have said goodbye.
I am still reeling from the news of this morning. Nevermind that I never knew you as well as I would have liked. Nevermind that there are those who are hurting over this far more than I am, or than I could ever comprehend. That doesn't make anything any easier for me, and this is one of the hardest deaths I have had to come to terms with (a sentence no one wants to utter but we all end up having to at some tragic fucking point in life.) nothing feels safe or solid right now, it has hit me with the force of an uncaring, unfeeling train speeding down the tracks that anyone and anything we know could be snuffed out in the blink of an eye.
There are no condolences or tired cliches that can make it alright, or soften the impact of someone just being suddenly fucking gone. We throw around placating standards, "remember the good times" and "they wouldn't want you to be sad". None of it helps, really. There is nothing that can be said or done to erase the cold, stark fact that we are all so fragile, that anything you love could be snatched away in an instant without any warning or signal of hard times ahead. No matter how good you are, we are all just chemicals, synapses, volatile forces that could collapse without any sign or premonition. At any moment, everything could be left unfinished, unwritten. That's not to say that I am not trying to take some good from this, to try and make sense of something that is just so completely fucking senseless. But, for the moment, I am giving into this sadness. Because, above all else, you deserve to be mourned, and missed. It's the least I can do. Work was crazy today. It's been dead (no pun intended, and that's not meant to be a joke in bad taste) all week, and then today it was just phone call after phone call after phone call. Everyone needed and wanted something, and it didn't stop. It's like the universe knew that this is what I needed to make it through the day.
That happened when my grandmother was toward the end. Still overcome with the shock of seeing her in a deteriorated state, so very different from the one I had known my entire life. I walked out into the cold, stark white hallway, tears streaming down my cheeks. Sniffling furiously, I suddenly noticed a bunny sitting in a basket in the hallway. Wiping away tears I asked in a stuffy, tear-soaked, wavering voice "is that a real bunny?" The nurse responded, "yes." and asked if I would like to hold him. He snuggled up beneath my chin, his soft fur rubbing against my skin and his tiny, perfect nose twitching in what was probably, in reality fear. But when his enormous eyes fixed on me I felt comforted, in a way that no human could ever comfort you, so soundlessly. Sometimes, the universe just knows you need a bunny.
To all of you close that are hurting today, I hope you have your bunny. It will never be okay, but someday it won't hurt so fucking much.
I am still reeling from the news of this morning. Nevermind that I never knew you as well as I would have liked. Nevermind that there are those who are hurting over this far more than I am, or than I could ever comprehend. That doesn't make anything any easier for me, and this is one of the hardest deaths I have had to come to terms with (a sentence no one wants to utter but we all end up having to at some tragic fucking point in life.) nothing feels safe or solid right now, it has hit me with the force of an uncaring, unfeeling train speeding down the tracks that anyone and anything we know could be snuffed out in the blink of an eye.
There are no condolences or tired cliches that can make it alright, or soften the impact of someone just being suddenly fucking gone. We throw around placating standards, "remember the good times" and "they wouldn't want you to be sad". None of it helps, really. There is nothing that can be said or done to erase the cold, stark fact that we are all so fragile, that anything you love could be snatched away in an instant without any warning or signal of hard times ahead. No matter how good you are, we are all just chemicals, synapses, volatile forces that could collapse without any sign or premonition. At any moment, everything could be left unfinished, unwritten. That's not to say that I am not trying to take some good from this, to try and make sense of something that is just so completely fucking senseless. But, for the moment, I am giving into this sadness. Because, above all else, you deserve to be mourned, and missed. It's the least I can do. Work was crazy today. It's been dead (no pun intended, and that's not meant to be a joke in bad taste) all week, and then today it was just phone call after phone call after phone call. Everyone needed and wanted something, and it didn't stop. It's like the universe knew that this is what I needed to make it through the day.
That happened when my grandmother was toward the end. Still overcome with the shock of seeing her in a deteriorated state, so very different from the one I had known my entire life. I walked out into the cold, stark white hallway, tears streaming down my cheeks. Sniffling furiously, I suddenly noticed a bunny sitting in a basket in the hallway. Wiping away tears I asked in a stuffy, tear-soaked, wavering voice "is that a real bunny?" The nurse responded, "yes." and asked if I would like to hold him. He snuggled up beneath my chin, his soft fur rubbing against my skin and his tiny, perfect nose twitching in what was probably, in reality fear. But when his enormous eyes fixed on me I felt comforted, in a way that no human could ever comfort you, so soundlessly. Sometimes, the universe just knows you need a bunny.
To all of you close that are hurting today, I hope you have your bunny. It will never be okay, but someday it won't hurt so fucking much.
Posted with Blogsyspaghetti cat
1. have once again let months go by without posting.
2. am sick because i finally got whatever has been making the rounds at the office.
3. only upside to sick=more time to watch random videos while in a nyquil-induced stupor. such as this one:
4. and also this one:
5. If you are bored and/or sick I recommend spending endless hours on Parry Gripps Youtube channel:
Hugs for buddies!
Thank you, Adventure Time, for the hug-wolf. And thank you to Kurt-William for: 1.) introducing me to Adventure Time. 2.) just being an awesome ten-year old, in general.
I'm gonna huuuuuuuug you.....
I'm gonna huuuuuuuug you.....
Huffington Post: Obama's Gay Marriage Endorsement a Step in Evolution of American Identity
Jon Stewart said something to this effect, as well, and I think this sums it up nicely:
I can kill you with my brain.
I've been searching for inspiration for my next tattoo via random google searches performed while bored/annoyed/desperately in need of something to distract me and keep my annoyance at bay. Today the idea of a 'Firefly' related tattoo popped into my head, and I spent some time looking for fan pics of tattoos. I particularly love this one:
Amid my search, I randomly stumbled across this:
This sent me off on a tangent and I began scouring the Internet for bad pop culture tattoos, and then just awful tattoos in general. Here are my top ten favorites, in order from 'made me chuckle' to 'I laughed so hard that I snorted':
Amid my search, I randomly stumbled across this:
This sent me off on a tangent and I began scouring the Internet for bad pop culture tattoos, and then just awful tattoos in general. Here are my top ten favorites, in order from 'made me chuckle' to 'I laughed so hard that I snorted':
That's disgusting...I can't look away
I learned about this comic book today, and it sounds amazing and gross. I'm probably going to read it:
Also, said a very awkward 'hello' to Jhonen Vasquez, and mumbled several equally awkward 'thank you''s as he autographed my shamefully tattered copies of 'Johnny the Homicidal Maniac'.
The 'Talking Dead' panel with Jon Bernthanal and Laurie Holden was great, and tomorrow morning is Summer Glau followed by Adam Baldwin! *sigh* I wish Comicon were every month.
Also, said a very awkward 'hello' to Jhonen Vasquez, and mumbled several equally awkward 'thank you''s as he autographed my shamefully tattered copies of 'Johnny the Homicidal Maniac'.
The 'Talking Dead' panel with Jon Bernthanal and Laurie Holden was great, and tomorrow morning is Summer Glau followed by Adam Baldwin! *sigh* I wish Comicon were every month.
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